AAAAAAAAAAAAA

I went to a work party. It's about the one time of year I go outside for anything other than work or doctor's appointments. With how long I've been working at my job I know nearly everyone there on some level. My social skills have become better over time, and I'm taking a medication now that negates nearly all the physical symptoms of anxiety, which is most of what my anxiety is. Talking to people is so much easier than it used to be, but even with that being the case, I still generally avoid it.

One of the incentives to showing up to the party is that I know I'll know someone there. There's no chance I'll show up and be the awkward person in the corner, or that I'll know someone and be disregarded as the awkward person in the corner anyway.

So I showed up. Got some free stuff. Free drinks. Rum and coke. I don't drink much. I don't really know what's good or not good as far as alcohol goes, but I know that rum and coke is good. I also had a tequila shot. I'm not sure what the tequila was, but it was good. It didn't taste like pure alcohol, rather it had a good aftertaste. I had to drive home so I didn't get too wild, but I probably wouldn't have even if I didn't have to drive.

Having minor amounts of anxiety can be weird. I'm a bit less inhibited because my body doesn't register fear the same way. This means I can do pretty much anything with some level of confidence. I usually know the right thing to do in social situations, and with my fear response lowered, I can do those things much more freely. At the party I greeted a lot of people pretty warmly, hugged a lot of people, some of which I hadn't seen in quite a while.

I socialized with some of the people I'm familiar with. The people I currently work with invited me to their table. There was another table of people that I formerly worked with. One of them called me a traitor. Another one came over and suggested I go see them so they'd feel included. I left my table after a while to go see them. I definitely wanted to see them, but I was being engaged at my table, so it took me a while to get over there.

Somewhere around that time the center of the room was cleared to be used as a dance floor. Someone asked me if I was going to go dance. I responded by saying "I'm too white, and too sober to do that."

One of my other co-workers came over from another table. Said something about how her fiance bet her she wouldn't be able to get me to dance with her. Apparently there was breakfast riding on the bet. I'm not outgoing, and I don't really know how to dance. I wasn't really sure I wanted to do it, but another co-worker said he would throw water in my face if I did it. That seemed like a good incentive to do it, so I went ahead and did it.

"How awkward is this going to be?" I thought.

It was alright. It was a bit awkward for me, but I didn't have to lead so it was non-issue.

As promised, I had water thrown in my face after and was called a "slut".

I complained at the minor amount of water that was thrown in my face.

Of course if that water had ended up on the floor, it would've been a problem.

Now I should probably mention: I don't remember how the water in the face thing came up. Not at all. I think it started off as a joke because it might confuse any onlookers. It sounded appealing to me because it wasn't boring. A little water doesn't hurt much.

I went back to the table I was sitting at originally for a bit. Some of them started heading out, so I did the same. I wasn't sure if I was expected to say goodbye to other people before leaving, but they did, so I figured I'd better do the same. autism

I said goodbye to most people in my area. There was another crowded table with the other two people I mentioned before sitting at it. I didn't say goodbye to them. I figured they wouldn't notice me leaving but I was wrong.

They called my name as I was walking out.

I stopped. "Oh fuck.", I thought, as I looked to the ground.

"I almost got away." I looked to the ceiling, and spun around to face them.

It's not like I don't like talking to people. It can be hard is all.

They called me over.

I got sandwiched in a hug, which then escalated into a 5 way hug with me in the center.

After that I had a full glass of water thrown in my face with the rest dumped on my head.

"That's more like it!" It felt nice.

Oh no.

Two of the girls made a fuss over it.

One of them being the one I danced with before.

I told them I asked for it.

They wouldn't take that as an answer.

"It's just water." I've had so much worse than this before.

They cleaned me up and made sure I was okay.

They briefly pulled up my shirt for some reason.

"Geez if I'd known throwing water in your face was going to get you this much attention, maybe I would've had you do it to me."

I was okay.

They demanded to walk me to my car.

I wasn't sure why they wanted to walk me to my car.

"I'm pretty sober, and I'm only a few minutes away from here."

I had to be the most sober person there, but they were insistent.

So they walked me to my car while hanging off me.

The attention was okay. I don't get attention like this very often.

I wouldn't have minded it anyway.

It's not like I've never humored a drunk person before.

They didn't let me get in my car right away.

They wanted to test to see if I was sober.

I walked a straight line.

Apparently I did it too fast.

I had to do it again, while reciting the alphabet backwards.

"I can't even do that sober."

It seemed like I convinced them after a while.

"I've seen him play baseball. Trust me, he's sober."

AAAAAAAAAA

One of them gave me a hug and left.

Well, the other one I danced with didn't leave.

She demanded I text her after getting home safely.

I think she threatened to beat me up if I didn't.

Eventually her fiance had to come wrangle her away.

She was threatening me even as they drove away.

I had a good time.

I haven't made a blog post in a while.

I have another rambling post I've been adding to little by little for the last few months.

I'll find some finish for it eventually.

Writing a pathfinder campaign has been incredibly time consuming.

I've had some other health issues I have to look into.

I have a doctor appointment on Tuesday. Hopefully it'll resolve the issue.

Then things can start getting back to normal.

ded.